Saturday 13 February 2010

Television review: Desperate Housewives #614: 'The Glamorous Life'

614: 'The Glamorous Life'

Wr: Dave Flebotte
Dr: Bethany Rooney

Synopsis: Gabrielle and Carlos grow concerned with the direction Ana and Danny's relationship might be taking. In the meantime, Susan befriends a stripper named Robin (guest star Julie Benz) and takes her under her wing, whereas Tom and Lynette come to a disagreement regarding their new therapist (guest star Jane Leeves). Bree watches over Orson as she fears he may commit suicide, and Angie tries to get a neighbor to sort out her garbage, much to Nick's dismay.

Review: At last! All my dreams have come true in just sixty short seconds of plot! Danny Bolen... with no shirt on! Rejoice, for this is a truly joyous occasion! Except, actually, it's not. In order to get the boy to this point, the writers have him cavort on top of SHE WHO SHALL NOT BE NAMED for a good few minutes which, quite frankly, I just don't need to see. Or imagine, as the case may be. Still, points for trying, Housewives, points for trying. And that, my friends, is a neat summary of the remainder of the episode. 'The Glamorous Life' doesn't always succeed but at the very least, its heart is in the right place. For the most part, it's trying to do something different and interesting, and not simply fall back into the comfortable pattern of regurgitated storytelling that typically plagues the show.

Take Lynette and Tom's narrative as an example. Their marriage guidance counselling proves somewhat entertaining for the most part. Their respective interactions are very believable and raise some crucial points about their personalities, and the subsequent pay-off is a well written two-hander in which some uncomfortable truths are revealed. Great. The problem, sadly, is Daphne from Frasier. Quite apart from that hideous mispronunciation of Antony and Cleopatra, there's enough annoyance here to fil your average Jimmy Carr stand up show. The idea that she is so hopelessly blinkered to believe that forgetting lines and having a crown fall unceremoniously off your head mid-speech actually constitutes good acting is just plain absurd. Any psychologist worth their salt would have the appropriate level of self-awareness to appreciate this fact, never mind the fastidiousness to be able to take even the harshest criticism. But not Daphne! Oh no, in the name of the 'comedic' (read 'banal'), she effectively throws the pair out of her office and tries desperately to hide her insecurities. It's another case of oneupmanship on the part of the central cast and consequently, the whole story just irritates.

Elsewhere, Susan takes on a stripper with a penchant for literature. Yes ladies and gentlemen, it's Julie Benz, Buffy and Angel's favourite centuries-old bloodsucker. And while her Housewives character might not have the flair and panache that Darla exuded from every pore, at least she doesn't turn out to have some sort of hidden, manipulative agenda. You know, like that druggie that Carlos and Gaby set up home with or the mother of the child that Gaby was going to adopt. It's actually quite a sweet storyline for the most part, demonstrating some much-needed kindheartedness but sadly, this being Housewives, the writers go and ruin it by turning MJ into a teenage horndog when he's all of seven or eight years old. "You can give me a bath anytime you want?" Sorry, what? Is this supposed to be funny? It's actually borderline disturbing, guys. Quit it. Meanwhile, Gabrielle gets hot and bothered at the very idea of Ana having sex with Danny which, coming from Miss Debaucho Supermodel, seems ludicrously out of character. If anything, Gaby would be giving the girl the protection talk that it takes Angie, of all people, to provide. On the subject of the escaped convict, we are treated to a few more details about her past as we find out that she was... an eco-terrorist! Probably. Yay. Ms Bolen gets all worked up about some recycling and, get this, actually kicks over some bins. Truly terrifying stuff. Still, at least someone actually catches a clue about the fact that there's more to the Bolens than meets the eye. Perhaps now the plot will actually go somewhere. Maybe Angie will declare war on carbon dioxide or something.

While these storylines all attempt to do something new but only partially succeed, Bree and Orson's manages to stay convincing throughout. For all the time and place of Orson's attempted suicide is painfully obvious (and come on, would you really leave him right next to some water when he's told you he wants to die?!), Marcia Cross and Kyle MacLachlan do such a stellar job with the dialogue they're given that these points hardly seem to matter. The closing moments, when Bree saves him and they reconcile with honesty and sincerity, contain some of the best writing Housewives has seen in a while and help to remind the viewer that yes, this was once a show worth investing time in. Hopefully, there are only bigger and better things to come in the latter half of the season. It is just a shame that the writing staff seem incapable of imbuing all of their narratives with this level of quality. To be fair to 'The Glamorous Life', it is evident that an effort is being made to crawl out of the hole that the programme has dug for itself in the last season or so. It's just going to take a lot of perseverance and hard work before it can truly see the light of day again. 6.8

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