Thursday 25 February 2010

Television review: Desperate Housewives #615: 'Lovely'

615: 'Lovely'

Wr: David Schladweilder
Dr: David Warren

Synopsis: Susan causes quite a stir when she invites a former stripper (guest star Julie Benz) into her home, because former exotic dancer Robin will have a profound effect on the ladies of Wisteria Lane: with three teenage boys at home, Lynette will need to keep a watchful eye on them, Bree needs to pick up a few tricks to engage Orson, Katherine needs to find a friendly companion, and Gabrielle needs help with her troublesome niece - and Robin might just provide that help, whether she wants to or not.

Review: Oh Housewives, you were so close. You nearly had it. For approximately thirty five minutes of your latest moderately amusing instalment, you actually managed to remain consistently entertaining, barely raising so much as an eyebrow with your storylines or reeking of desperation with your attempts at humour. Thanks to a refreshing change of narrative structure and a tempered array of character development, 'Lovely' actually evokes the Housewives of old, far from critically outstanding but a jolly old romp nonetheless. And if only they hadn't gone there. If only they hadn't done it. If only Marc Cherry could've kept his desire for ratings bumps in his pants and consequently, kept his head screwed on correctly. Then, perhaps, he would've realised that turning Katherine Mayfair towards lesbianism might not be the most inventive or engaging idea he's ever had; that, in fact, it actually threatens to ruin the fabric of the episode entirely.

Now, let's get one thing straight (hah!) before we continue. The incorporation of a queer storyline into the Housewives framework, at its core, has the potential to be an excellent thing. The show's tried over the years, with varying degrees of success, but it's always reigned on its promises, never really delivering the goods, so to speak. Andrew got pushed to the wayside fairly quickly after he stopped being a thorn in his mother's side and as for Bob and Lee, well, when was the last time they even had a storyline? The revelation that Robyn is queer, if not lesbian (since she seems to suggest a 'shift' from men) is therefore very welcome, as it offers the opportunity for an alternative perspective on sexuality, visualising, if not normalising, the 'other'. It's also a character trait that we can buy into as we don't have a wealth of experience with Robyn; she's essentially a blank slate. Katherine Mayfair, on the other hand, is a different matter altogether. Having always appeared straight in the two plus years we've known her, never demonstrating any ulterior proclivities, as soon as an attractive woman enters her life who suggests the possibility of 'widening the net', she starts barking up a different tree? Okay, okay so she brushes the suggestion aside at first, but Mary Alice's voiceover hints that she's finding herself thinking - oh! shameful - thoughts about Robyn and you can only guess where this is liable to head in next week's episode. It is arguable, of course, that Housewives should be commended for demonstrating the fluidity of sexuality, contradicting the hegemonic, erroneous notion that persuasion is fixed and determined, and this would be a valid notion of these plots weren't so standard in American television drama, and if it didn't feel like such a throwaway attempt to 'get people talking' It's virtually guaranteed that Benz will disappear from our screens within a week or two and Katherine will return to yearning for the c**k. And in any case, it's frustrating that previously straight characters can so easily chop and change in TV (Party of Five? The OC? Any number of soaps?) simply because some homo comes along and gets them all hot and bothered about something different. God, if only it were that way in reality; whenever I find out that a guy I fancy is straight, it's the end of the possibility. It doesn't pique the boy's interest. We simply don't have that power, but Housewives and so many others would have you believe so. It's just so damn disposable as you know it'll have no lasting effect on anything in the future. Personally, I'd sooner we spent more time on the established gay characters, on Bob, Lee, Andrew even (bring him back!) instead of throwing gimmicky schlock stories into the mix left, right and centre.

Sadly, this leaves a rather bitter taste in the mouth as 'Lovely's conclusion significantly impacts on the overall quality of the episode. This is certainly unfortunate as, for the most part, all else is actually quite enjoyable. The story's unconventional narrative structure works in its favour, compartmentalising all the housewives' experiences of Robyn, thereby affording each of them a greater and more considered amount of screen time and also serving to three-dimensionalise her. We are treated to all manner of facets of Benz's character, which is certainly refreshing for a bit part, enabling the viewer to better engage with her. In effect, once we've witnessed her impact on Wisteria Lane, we actually begin to care about what happens to the gal, which is more than can be said for a great number of other guest roles in the show's history (I still don't give a c**p about Ana... thank God she's been shipped off to New York, no matter how ridiculous that is! I mean come on, Gaby's able to make a quick phone call and get her out of the state? Huh?! No, no complaining - at least she's off my screen!) Additionally, this provides an anchor for the narrative, lending the episode a cohesive feel that has perhaps been missing from Housewives for some time.

The actual stories themselves often prove to be quite amusing. Bree's narrative, in particular, is something of a howler, Marcia Cross proving particularly adept at bleeding every drop of humour from the most miniscule of plot details. Her 'striptease' is absolutely priceless, utterly cringe worthy and in the baddest of taste, but it's unrelenting, not ending until she herself is injured. With every passing moment, the viewer desperately wants her to stop but you just can't look away and Orson's bemusement works as the perfect counter to the sequence. Of course, it is questionable whether Bree would continue to so evidently embarrass herself when it's obvious that Orson has no interest in what she's doing, but the moment is amusing enough to brush off these concerns and the pay-off works nicely to restore some of the chemistry that had previously been lost between the two characters. Similarly, for all Mike and Susan's experience with the stripper is a fairly bog-standard run through a set of beats that are notoriously well-worn (Susan gets jealous because Robyn is suggestive), it's handled delicately enough and without 'crossing the line' into the OTT. It teeters occasionally, most specifically when Benz straddles Mike while in very little gear, but we are thankfully spared any additional excess, such as Robyn insisting that Mike relax in bed while she's fixing his back. Susan's jealousy is logical and it leads to a nice resolution, in which Benz determines that it is in her best interests to relocate. Then we have Lynette and Tom, whose anniversary is jeopardised slightly by Tom's suggestion that women only ever have sex with men due to their spending. his is a pleasingly realistic narrative, borne of a simple, throwaway remark, that leads to some enjoyable dialogue and even gives the grossly underused Parker some airtime.

On the whole, 'Lovely' is a genuinely enjoyable episode, bereft of anything too ludicrous or patently unrealistic. It's good to see a peripheral character given such prominent attention (do you think this could be to make us care when she's executed by whomever targeted Julie and killed the girl in the restaurant? Calling it now!), which has the consequence of improving the quality of the central cast's respective narratives and lending the episode a better level of cohesion. It's a shame, then, that the writers feel the need to ruin their efforts by including such a blatant attempt at ratings-grabbing as the hint that Katherine might have some lil' ol lesbian tendencies. Once again, an American television drama is treating queer sexuality as something disposable and schlock-worthy, rather than as just a basic fact of life. For all I want to believe that this will lead to something engaging and fresh for the show, I have no faith whatsoever that it will last beyond the next episode. Katherine will go back to being hungry for c**k, Benz will disappear and Bob and Lee will get precisely no screen time. It's a real shame that this has to be the coda as it puts a substantial dampener on an otherwise fine instalment. Stop tripping over your own feet Housewives, you need to be able to stand tall. 7.0

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